a man loses his job. his wife convinces him to apply for a janitorial position at the local high school - hey, it's a job - and he concedes. after an interview, the employer states, "you seem to be just what we're looking for. just fill out this application for me. it's just a formality." the man (we'll call him bob) reviews the appllication three times over and says, "i'm sorry, sir, but i can't read or write." the employer considers this and confesses, "i'm sorry then. you at least have to be able to read and write. there are dangerous chemicals around and constant deliveries for which you'd have to sign." bob leaves feeling utterly dejected. fortunately, bob's wife's brother, john, was visiting and calmed bob's fears. john got him started in the dry cleaning business. "all you have to do is match the customer's ticket number to the ones on the rack." bob figured this was easy enough and headed his own business. with time, bob expanded his business and eventually owned 5 dry cleaning services in the greater philadelphia area. he became very wealthy but was also very philantropic. he donated to all kinds of charities and youth services every year. this went on for about two decades when the mayor decided to throw a banquet of appreciation for bob. the big day arrived, everyone was in attendance, and the mayor took the stage. "i would like to show our appreciation - bob, why don't you come up here and read this plaque commemorating your community service." bob walks up to the stage, takes the plaque, and says, "mr. mayor, i'm sorry, but i can't read this plaque. i can't read or write." a consentual gasp flooded the banquet hall and the mayor took a second to gather his bearings. "that's unfortunate, sir. and, with all due respect, can you imagine how much more successful you could have been had you been able to read and write?" "with all due respect," said bob, "if i knew how to read and write, i'd be a janitor." take that!